What happens in the bathroom, stays in the bathroom

Our house is so small that when it's humid and the dryer is on, the bathroom mirror steams up.  One evening, I walked into the bathroom to find Hassaan drawing his name on the mirror.  He then starts to draw a picture.  When I ask what he's drawing, Hammad apparently knows because he starts giggling hysterically.  Hassaan, it turns out, is drawing a picture of his butt in the steam on the wall to wall mirror. 

I called to Abdullah and told him to get his child off the counter and get his teeth brushed.  So what did Abdullah do? Abdullah taught him (and his brother) how to turn around and actually press his butt on the mirror instead of just drawing it. *sigh*

There is waaaaaaaaaay too much testosterone in this house some days.

My son the drama queen

Hassaan (having temper tantrum): "I HAVE TO GO PEE!!!! I'm gonna pee my pants!!!" 

Me (calmly, trying not to roll my eyes): "You're in the bathroom."

Hassaan: "I HAVE TO PEE!!!" (now has no pants on) "I can't hold it and I'll pee on the floor!!!!"

Me: "You're in. the. bathroom."

Hassaan (crying & screaming): "I HAVE TO PEE!!!!"

Me: "Turn around Hassaan. You're standing in front of the toilet."

Hassaan (calmly): "Oh."

Battleship!

So Hassaan and Hammad gave Abdullah the game "Battleship" for his birthday earlier this week.  Because the boys are still a bit young to do it on their own, we play in teams.  Today was Abdullah and Hammad versus Hassaan and myself.  Part of this is because, after a certain point, sometimes Hassaan is just done playing, so he'll just get up and leave.  Not too helpful in a two player game.  Well, he did this during this afternoon's game.

A few minutes after deciding he was done playing Hassaan decided he was no longer done playing and came back over and sat down next to me.  He then pointed to the board.  And so began what turned into the funniest thing all day.

Hassaan: "You have to do this one and this one" (pointing to two squares on the board)

Me: "why?"

Hassaan: "well, when I was walking past, i saw their boats there and there."

Me: starts laughing so hard I end up crying during this, Abdullah is trying to explain to Hassaan how this is cheating.  Hassaan just keeps saying "well, I just walked by.  I didn't really look.  I was walking by and saw it out of the corner of my eyes, because I had to walk past your side to get back over here.  And I couldn't stop laughing.

Let's just say the next game of Battleship will have Hassaan sitting on that side of the table in case he decides to quit and come back again!

Letting the cat out

So now that all the paperwork is in and done, I can say what's been going on for the past few months.

In March, after much thought, we started Hassaan on the most minimal dose of Adderall that he can be on.  The changes, as the teacher that filled out his secondary Connor's Scale report stated, are amazing.  Because his normal classroom teacher has been on sick leave for the last two months, his Junior Kindergarten teacher, who got Hassaan at his most challenging last year, we in for a few weeks as the supply teacher.  She filled out the new, post-meds, Connor's Scale and Hassaan's scores went from 3s and 4s to 0s and 1s. Alhamdulillah that it's working and Hassaan's now able to be a full, co-operative, participant in his classroom.  His supply teachers have told other teachers (including my mother) that he's been so good and co-operative.  Two words never applied to Hassaan in the last year and a half.  I'm not a pusher of medication.  In fact, it took a lot of thought and prayer before Abdullah and I agreed on medication.  And I do believe in working together with the paediatrician and psychologist.  However, unfortunately, until my workplace contract is settled and my benefits are actually in stone (or as stone as they are going to be) to cover the rather expensive psychologist.

Rage episodes in the evenings have all but stopped.  His teachers say that the other kids are now choosing to play with Hassaan rather than ignoring him altogether.  Hassaan, however, still pretty much ignores them, but his behaviour no longer pushes them away.

As his mom, I'm not entirely thrilled he's on medication. But I am happy that, for at least the time being, Hassaan's life has gotten just a bit easier and the real Hassaan has the chance to shine through :)

And now the other kid

For months - since our first parent teacher interview back in November - Hammad's teacher has been at me to get him tested for ADD.  Not ADHD like Hassaan has, but ADD.  I kept saying that no, there's not a problem, he's just a little spacey and doesn't like to do things that don't interest him, as well as this darned perfectionist streak that he's got.  But then today Abdullah and I got to sit in on his class to watch him do his speech (on his visite de conservatoire de papillon).  Hammad was third up.  So we got to observe him as well.  The wonderful thing about being six is that you don't always realize when people are watching you just to watch you.  And what I saw has me stepping back and changing my tune.

"Space cadet" does not even cover it.  Hammad is a very smart, very creative little boy who is becoming more and more obviously off in his own planet, to the point that his teacher doesn't have anything to evaluate for report cards. So now, we contact the doctor and get him evaluated as well.  If (big IF) he is on the ADD scale, it would be closer to the type that I have been diagnosed with - inattentive ADD.

On one hand, if he does have it, we can do something about him and give him the skills to succeed, the skills that I didn't have because I was repeatedly told I wasn't trying hard enough.  On the other, I really hope he doesn't have it, because two kids on the ADD/ADHD scale isn't my idea of a good time.

This is the face of ADHD

This is the face of ADHD.

This is Hassaan.

He is five and a half years old.

He is a smart, vibrant, loving little boy.

This is the face of ADHD.

When he's in a good mood, he's all cuddles and giggles.

When he's in a bad mood, it's like a monster inside has taken over.

That's when you have to remember that smart, loving little boy.

This is the face of ADHD.

The is the face of a child who says he's dumb, stupid and an idiot because he knows he's not like other kids.

This is the face of a child who says there are bees buzzing in his head and he can't stop them or himself sometimes.

This is the face of a little boy who's not dumb, but so smart he gave up adding numbers and started adding letters.

This is the face of ADHD.

This is Hassaan.

He is my son, my baby, and my heart.

He is what brings me the greatest joy and the greatest pain.

He is what I fight for when the world tells me that he's just being a brat or refuses the support I know he needs.

This is the face of ADHD.

What I want to be when I grow up.

Hassaan's school had a spirit day a couple of weeks ago.  It was "What I want to be when I group up Day".  Hassaan wants to be a veterinarian/worker man.  I told him to be the worker man to pay for vet school.  I borrowed a safety shirt from a friend at work, used literally about 30 safety pins to make it easier for him to wear (the sleeves alone are doubled up twice).  Used my old safety hard hat from work (when we were allowed to decorate them) and took his brother's old ankle boots and put duct tape (we're Canadian!  Duct tape is for EVERYTHING - so says Red Green!) on the toes to make them look like steel toed boots, borrowed a safety vest from my boss, and sent him off to school looking like this -